Shaping that foundation is critical, here are two helpful questions we should ask ourselves before a relationship spontaneously begins to grow.
Being single is actually a gift, if you treat it as such. It gives you the opportunity to do some things that would become more difficult after marriage, and properly prepare for marriage if that is your goal.
But you’re only 21. Or 22. Or 23. If you’ve made it this far, standing on the edge of graduation, about to take that big leap into the realm of adulthood (salary, car payment, rent/mortgage), then you look at my life and maybe dread becoming me: 31 and single.
If prayer is real at all, it should help us in our constant struggle to come to terms with our sexuality and sexual drives, among the strongest urges (not new information!) we possess.
Everybody has their battles, and relationships are perhaps the largest battleground there is. Our emotions toward the opposite sex are so inexplicably strong, and many have been hurt so badly.
After 20 years in the profession of helping people, I have come to understand something: we cause much of our pain by the people we choose. In every kind of clinical issue that psychologists deal with, relationships are a big part of the picture in some way.
I was doing a radio show one day when a young woman called in and said she didn’t know what to do with her boyfriend. When I asked what she meant, she said that she was struggling with whether to break up or to keep going, get more serious, and move toward marriage.
When I was a kid, I envisioned a storybook future. I truly believed that one day I was going to meet my Prince Charming and we would live happily ever after. My life would be complete. Well, life isn’t a fairytale. But that didn’t stop me from seeking affirmation and significance from guys.
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