How Could You Love Me if You Really Knew Me?

Discussion Guide

Thank you for choosing to engage with the Desire series.

We hope this guide will help you discuss the material with a friend. Your conversation will be more rewarding if you take some time to read through the article and this guide before you meet.

Getting Started

  1. If you’re comfortable doing so, invite God to be part of your conversation.
  2. Discuss what stood out to you from the article.
  3. Talk about anything from the article that you have questions about or don’t understand.

Key Points From Article #1

  • Shame is believing you are unworthy of love because of who you are or something you’ve done.

    Discuss:
    • How have you experienced sexual shame? If you’re comfortable, share that with your discussion partner.
       
  • Shame by its nature is isolating; it makes us want to hide our true selves.

    Discuss:
    • Read Genesis 3:6-10. Why is it natural to want to run and hide from feelings of shame?
    • In order to gain acceptance, how do you try to cover up on the outside the inadequacies you feel on the inside?
    • Why can’t you overcome shame by hiding or isolating yourself?
  • Intimacy and shame cannot coexist. Intimacy can be established by being honest about your pain and struggles with a safe person. This can be difficult, depending on your background.

    Discuss:
    • Did you grow up in a family where sex was talked about as something dirty or dangerous?
    • Was it talked about at all?
    • How has that affected the way you think about sex?

Next Steps — Read through these together.

  • Start the healing process by talking honestly to God about any sexual shame you feel. He is the safest one you can turn to.
  • Mark a date on your calendar to discuss another article from the Desire series.

 

 

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