Starting a Conversation With a Student

Jasmine was a volunteer at a Cru outreach. New students were showing up, and the room buzzed with potential. But instead of diving in, Jasmine felt the familiar pull toward comfort, drifting toward the other volunteers. She had to remind herself: These students might not know anyone. And God’s calling me to love them enough to go first. So she whispered a prayer, stepped out of her comfort zone, and walked up to two girls standing by themselves. A conversation started. It changed everything.

Starting a conversation might feel awkward, but it’s one of the most powerful things you can do in student ministry. Whether you’re a high school leader or an adult volunteer, this is where ministry begins.

Why Is It So Hard to Start?

Let’s be honest, walking up to someone you don’t know feels risky. What if it’s awkward? What if they give one-word answers? The truth is, students feel it too. Many walk into Cru events carrying walls of insecurity or discomfort, unsure of how they fit in. They’re unlikely to approach you first, which means someone needs to take the first step. That someone might be you.

Why It Matters

A student who feels seen is a student who might come back. Starting a conversation is an act of love, and sometimes, a step of faith. It opens the door to belonging, trust, and eventually, the gospel. Many students decide whether Cru is “for them” based on their first interaction. You might be the difference between them staying or ghosting.

“Starting a conversation might feel awkward, but it’s one of the most powerful things you can do in student ministry.”

How to start a conversation

1. Be Intentional

Before an event, pray for specific students. Ask God to lead you to someone who needs connection. Come with a goal, maybe it’s to meet two new students. Remember names. Snap a photo of the group and review it later. Take notes or ask them to spell their name in your phone so it sticks.

2. Be Interested, Not Impressive

Ask questions. Notice a hoodie, a backpack, or a sports team on a shirt. “Hey, are you a Lakers fan?” goes further than “So… how was your day?” Find out what they care about and care about it too. Every student is interesting. They just need someone to notice.

3. Find Common Ground

Music, shows, sports, hometowns, connection often happens in the small stuff. “How’d you hear about this meeting?” is always a solid opener. Once you find a shared interest, you’ll feel the conversation shift from forced to natural.

4. Rely on Students You Already Know

One of the best ways to meet new students is through students you already have a connection with. Ask them to introduce you to their friends at events, school, or youth group. Better yet, challenge them to bring someone new to Cru and introduce them to you. Students trust students—so let that open the door for you.

5. Be Where Students Are

Show up at school events. Sit near the student section. Ask students you know to help you learn what’s going on. Go where they already hang out, whether that’s the gym, the lunchroom, or the Chick-fil-A parking lot.

6. Be Yourself

You don’t need to be cool. You need to be present. Students are less concerned with your résumé and more concerned with whether you actually see them. God can use your personality, your story, and your awkwardness.

7. Look for the Lonely

Keep your radar up. Is someone sitting alone? Invite them to help set up, jump in a game, or pass out snacks. Give them a role. Inclusion often starts with an invitation.

“If you don’t start the conversation, it probably won’t happen.”

What to Say: A Few Conversation Starters

Are you new here? I don’t think we’ve met.
What year are you in school?
Who did you come with tonight?
I saw your t-shirt—are you a fan of that team/band/show?
What do you usually do after school?

My name’s ___. What’s yours?

Bottom Line: No Conversations = No Ministry

You can’t disciple someone you haven’t met. You can’t welcome someone you haven’t spoken to. If you don’t start the conversation, it probably won’t happen. So pray, take a deep breath, and go first. It doesn’t have to be perfect—it just has to be real.

Want to grow in this? Set a goal. Two new students a week. One conversation every event. Then trust God to show up.

Next Step

Ask God to direct you and then start one conversation this week with a student you do not know. Decide on several questions you can ask and see where the conversation goes!

Conversations

This article is part of the Conversation Collection. Read the rest of these articles to get an even better understanding of how to have great conversations with students.

Cru Logos

Your logo is often the first thing people see. Using the official Cru logo keeps your materials looking credible and connected to the bigger mission.

Download your Cru Logos Here!

Get more Logo options at cru.org/brand/logos.

Cru Colors (Main color palette)

Cru’s colors aren’t random—they’re chosen to reflect who we are. Using them helps your flyers, slides, and social posts feel unmistakably Cru. For more options, be sure to check out the full color selection at cru.org/brand/color.

Cru Fonts

Fonts shape how your message feels. Stick with the Cru fonts to keep your materials clean, readable, and on-brand—without overthinking it. Our Cru Fonts are Sora and Inter. Click the name of the font to download it. Below are some basics of how to use them but you can learn more about how to match our brand at cru.org/brand/typography.

Next Step

Explore more branding tools at cru.org/brand

Learn More

A Letter To The Principal

Dear Principal,

We know your job is one of the most important and demanding roles in your community. As leaders with Cru, a faith-based student organization, we want to support your school in a way that is respectful, helpful, and fully aligned with your policies and values.

Cru has been working with high school students since 1969, helping teenagers grow in character, leadership, and purpose. We’ve learned over the years that students thrive when they have consistent, caring adults in their lives—something your staff works tirelessly to provide. We want to complement that effort, not compete with it. We come alongside schools by equipping student-led clubs, serving where there are needs, and building safe relationships that encourage positive development.

Research backs this up. According to the Search Institute, “nothing—nothing—has more impact in the life of a child than positive relationships.” Cru is committed to creating those relationships through our presence on campus, always under the supervision of school administration and in cooperation with a teacher sponsor or staff liaison.

In most of our locations, Cru is an official school club led by students and supported by teacher sponsors. We recognize your responsibility to protect and guide the students under your care, and we work within your guidelines to ensure all activity is appropriate and beneficial.

Our program provides support for students to meet—either on or off campus—in large groups or small groups, to grow in leadership development and in their faith. These environments give students a place to belong, discuss real-life challenges, and encourage one another to make positive choices.

Nothing shapes a student more than a caring relationship—and that’s where Cru shows up.

Here are just a few ways Cru has supported schools around the country:

Hosting student leadership workshops in partnership with student government
Facilitating student mentor groups using The Priceless Project curriculum (developed for public schools)
Organizing family-friendly community events that bring people together in positive ways

We believe every student should have at least one place on campus where they feel seen, safe, and valued. As Principal Michael Halt of Estancia High School shared:

“It’s important that every student have one place that they can turn to. To feel safe. To know that they belong and to feel valued. For a lot of students, it’s our sports programs. For others, it’s some of our extracurricular programs, such as band or drama. And for a large number of students here at Estancia, it’s Cru.”

Thank you for the work you do to lead your school. We would love to be one of the many supports you can count on to care for students well.

Sincerely,
The Cru Team

Next Step

If you're a leader at your school, we'd love to meet with you. CLICK HERE to see if Cru is in your area.

If you are a student or adult wanting to start Cru at your campus, set up an appointment with your principal to talk about it. Check out our How to talk with a Principal article.

how to talk with a principal

A Letter to Local Churches and Ministries

At Cru, we deeply value the role of the local church. We’re not here to replace it, compete with it, or distract from its mission. We’re here to partner.

High school campuses are full of students who are asking deep questions, navigating pressure, and searching for purpose. As a church, you care about those students. So do we. That’s why we want to link arms with you to help reach students where they are—right in their schools.

Cru has been helping caring adults and students go to their campuses since 1967. We provide the tools, resources, and encouragement to come alongside what your church is already doing. Not every church has the capacity to run full-blown student ministries, and even those that do often find schools hard to access. That’s where we can help.

The best way to reach students is through partnership, not competition.

We’re not trying to bring a program to your church. We’re inviting you to join us in bringing hope and care to schools in your community. Whether you send a volunteer to encourage students on campus, help students launch a club, or co-host a local event, there are plenty of ways to get involved.

And we don’t do it alone. We train, background check, and support every adult who works with students. We follow school policies and lead with humility and respect. Our heart is to be a positive presence on campus that supports the school’s goals while also helping students grow in character, leadership, and faith.

We believe churches have something unique to offer students—and so do schools. This isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing it together.