The E-Word

If we’re honest, we know that the “e-word” often stirs feelings of guilt (when we don’t do it) and fear (that if we do, we’ll lose relationships or influence). Instead of dreading the mention of the word “evangelism,” let’s try to evaluate our preconceived notions of what we may be talking about when we say “sharing our faith.” If we want to grow as Christian leaders, we need to know ourselves well enough to be self-differentiated individuals, who actively engage with how the gospel can both critique and commend the many messages we hear in a given day. Ideally, our natural response to being loved should be to talk about our first love, Jesus.

OBJECTIVE

Over the course of this module, you will…

• Reflect on the compassion of Christ and the grace of the gospel.
• Map out your current relational networks.
• Reject the false cultural narrative which stops us from engaging the spiritual interest in those God has connected us to.
• Ask and believe God to open up authentic conversations about Him with people in your relational networks.
• Explore how you can team up with another believer to create opportunities for deeper conversations through Connect Spaces.

“So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us. ”

1 THESSALONIANS 2:8

UNDERSTAND | What Compassion Looks Like:

In Matthew 9, Jesus is among a weary and wounded humanity. Throughout the chapter, Jesus interacts with numerous people, healing and teaching, and we see that he was “moved with compassion.” The deep sense of concern Jesus expressed was because he saw they were in need of direction and desperately in need of physical and spiritual healing. Imagine if you discovered the cure for a deadly disease. Amazing, right? But what would happen if this miracle medicine was thought to be poison? That sums up the challenge of sharing the gospel in our generation. Because of a lot of personal, historical, and cultural baggage, the message (that Jesus is the universal cure to our sin-sickness) can sound more like poison than cure. But there is good news! Just like in Jesus’ time, people are desperate and looking for direction. And, research has shown us, when we lead with compassion, people are very open to hear about the things we love most.

From a 2019 study done by Barna Research Group, 47% of young people surveyed indicated that they believed it was immoral for them to share their Christian faith with someone from another faith. In looking at the motivations behind why more spiritual conversations don’t happen, another study quoted in the New York Times, by author Jonathan Merritt explained, “Some said these types of conversations create tension or arguments (28%); others feel put-off by how religion has been politicized (17%); others still report not wanting to appear religious (7%), sound weird (6%) or seem extremist (5%).”

However, when surveyed by Cru, 85% of respondents from a diverse set of spiritual backgrounds said they would be willing to talk to someone about Jesus if they upheld five basic truths to the conversation. These facts reveal a tragically ironic impediment to the world knowing who Jesus is:

• nearly half of Christian young adults think it is wrong and offensive to share their faith and yet …
• 85% of people would be willing to have a spiritual conversation.

We need to push past the false cultural narrative that people don’t want to hear, and instead, learn how to position ourselves with a compassionate and clear communication approach. So what were those five ways of communicating that made 85% of respondents willing to talk about Jesus?

1. Be present and listen: follow the conversation in a natural and engaging way. This means: follow their agenda and not yours.
2. Find common ground: build a relational bridge and not just a spiritual chasm.
3. Walk in their shoes: Prioritize understanding their story and not sharing your own conclusions. People want how they see the world to be understood, not simply rebutted.
4. Talk like a real person: use words meant for a real person, not just for the pews. Avoid churchy cliches.
5. Create a better story: It’s about sharing your faith in a way that helps them re-imagine the brokenness they are experiencing in their own life and in the world around them. Offer them more than just an evangelistic conversation. Show them the redemptive implications of knowing Jesus. He restores brokenness.

“I have decided to love. If you are seeking the highest good, I think you can find it through love. And the beautiful thing is that we are moving against wrong when we do it, because John was right, God is love. He who hates does not know God, but he who has love has the key that unlocks the door to the meaning of ultimate reality.”

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.

PRACTICE

Relational Networks Exercise: God has placed each of us in places of influence even though we may not be aware of it. The goal of this exercise is to begin to see how God is positioning you to both publically share the gospel and to create a culture that reflects God’s image.

• Think through 3 to 4 natural networks in your life (work, neighborhood, apartment, hobbies and interests, etc).
• On a piece of paper, place your name in the middle and draw lines to these 3-4 networks.
• Around each relational network, write down names of people you interact with in that particular network who seem disconnected from Jesus and His people.
• Circle the names of people with whom you have mutual friends who are followers of Jesus.
• Put a “X” beside 3-5 people with whom God has given you unique favor (someone who trusts you and enjoys you for who you are).
• Ask Jesus to give you His heart of compassion for your friends. Please take time to pray that your friends will have a profound encounter
  with Jesus.

Interview a friend about spiritual matters: While bringing up religion can feel taboo, if we never break through these natural sound barriers, we may always feel stuck and not engage in deeper spiritual conversations. A Spiritual Matters Interview template has been provided as a training to help those who feel intimidated by the idea of talking to unbelievers about spiritual matters. Use the questions provide, or come up with your own.

Use this as an introduction for the Spiritual Matters Interview:

“The church is better at talking than listening. I’m doing this activity to learn to listen to people who may not embrace my beliefs. I have five questions about faith and religion and I only want to listen to your answers and thoughtfully respond if you would like me to. This is not for the purpose of getting into a debate with you. I may
ask a clarification follow-up question, but not in order to argue. And this is also not ‘market research’ of any kind. The purpose is to really listen to people and hear what people today think about faith, church, and religion. Would you mind talking with me?”

The 5 Questions:

1. What do you think is the biggest problem facing us today, and what can be done about it?
2. Do you think it is possible to know if there is a God? Why or why not?
3. How do you determine whether an action is right or wrong?
4. What do you find most compelling (or what do you like most) about Christianity?
5. What are your biggest objections (or what do you find most implausible) about Christianity?

PROCESS

Debrief and share with your “Process Partner” the Relational Networks Exercise and Spiritual Matters Interview.

• How is Jesus growing your heart of compassion?
• What authentic questions can you ask your friends that might spur on spiritual conversations?
• What did you notice from people’s interest and/or responses in the Spiritual Matters Interview? Was it difficult to get the conversation started?
• What fears and barriers surfaced for you?

ACT

Research shows that, on average, an unbeliever needs to know 5.2 authentic believers before they consider the claims of Christ. What would it look like if you gathered your friends who know Christ and those who don’t know Christ in a way that would allow for authentic relationships to develop? Ray Oldenburg, in his book The Great Good Place, explains 5 characteristics of gatherings where people from diverse spiritual backgrounds connect with one another.

1. Neutral ground (People experience safety)
2. Leveler (People experience equality)
3. Conversation is main activity (People experience connection) 4. The Regulars (People experience familiarity)
5. A home away from home (People experience security)

Brainstorm some potential events you could help host in your neighborhood, work community, or social networks where you could create this type of environment. Ideally, you would be able to ask some of the questions from the Spiritual Matters Interview in an organic way.

• What are some practical ideas you have for an event to bring Christians and non-Christians together (flowing out of who you uniquely are, where you already are)? You can host something completely new and unique, or simply be intentional with something already in the rhythm of your life (i.e. Saturday brunches, etc.)
• What are the barriers that might keep you from hosting an event? Who can you ask to do this with you?