Sweet. Nice. Smart. Musical.
That’s how others defined me, so it’s how I decided to define myself. Having other people see me as successful felt like the most important thing I could achieve.
I graduated tenth in my class, was first chair in the band’s oboe section and was headed to a bright future. But every success ended. Each was temporary, and once it was over I had to ask, “Now what?”
I had to keep performing.
But failures always seemed to outweigh successes. I needed some kind of lasting joy in my life.
When I went to college, some women from Cru approached me about joining a Bible study.
I had heard the words "gospel" and "good news," but I didn't know what they meant. Instead, I pretended I knew and that I had been a Christian for years.
In the spring, my Bible study leaders asked, “Do you know what the gospel is?” I pretended I knew, but they saw through that. They shared The Four Spiritual Laws booklet with me.
A lot of people say God should let you into heaven if you’re a good person. That spring was the first time I learned that, contrary to how the world works, God doesn't look at me for what I do and what I accomplish. All people are sinful.
Ultimately we all fail. No matter how good I am, I have made mistakes. There is a lot deep within me that is not right or good. It doesn't matter whether I am perfectly behaved. What matters is that I have the forgiveness and grace of Christ.
I put my faith in Him while sitting in my dorm room.
God loves me despite my imperfections.
Christa Gould graduated from Ohio University in 2008 with degrees in journalism and Spanish. She serves Athletes in Action, an affiliate ministry of Cru.
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